Since December, I have been, and I am hoping YOU have been,
thinking about what romance means to you.
And what form of romance do you and your mate gravitate towards?
If you haven't had time to think about it...don't stress about it.
You can start now...
the biggest thing I hope we will all do,
is not let the pressures of life
cause us to put it on cruise control.
Think about it, the people I have met on-line,
care about their kids,
and maintaining a home that provides warmth, love, and stability.
People who work to make a home that is a refuge
and that people feel welcome in.
We also seem to understand that our finances won't take care of themselves,
and neither will our bodies, and neither will those dishes,
or the oil change that is due for the car.
We have to bring that same attitude to marriage.
Marriage is such a gift and a wonderful blessing,
and everyone of us knows that.
But, it's just so stinkin' easy to put off
the things we can do to enrich and maintain it,
because we think it's a luxury item to spend that extra $20-40,
or take that extra time away
from all that needs doing, and the children.
Or worse, we think, "oh, we'll do it next week, or next month..."
At least we do when we are under time pressures,
and or financial pressures.
What's on my heart is, for myself and anyone else who is interested in joining me,
working to change that mindset.
We have been as guilty of it as anybody.
Our problem is we are really good at doing the simple things,
and it's real easy to 'rest on those laurels',
if you know what I mean.
So, enough about that whys, I am going to to tell you a little of
what my romancing has been looking like since December 19th!
If you haven't read that post, just click here.
On my anniversary, as I was pondering,
I felt the Lord impress on my heart, in very light-hearted way,
that this would be The Year of Romance.
Now, to put it in perspective, the previous year had a theme also,
but that's for another time! :)
I felt impressed, that there were 12 months,
and that was room for at least 12 different occassions,
that my Honey and I would connect in a fresh way,
out of the normal routine.
And our marriage would be the sweeter for it,
and so would the fruit of our marriage,
because that is what a good marriage should do.
Well, people who really know me, know I am not romantic,
but I DO adore romance! It's a weird combination, but it's true!
To be honest, romance is so much something I NEVER thought about,
that I didn't know that about myself until that day, December 19th 2007.
I just didn't think about it!
What I discovered during these past 4 weeks, as I looked back over our marriage, is
My Honey was always the one who took the initiative at the romantic area.
Now, I am really good at acts of service and purchases,
gifts, words, and such, to show love...
but, to break out of the routine,
and make the purpose be just to focus on each other,
for a little while.
Not so good at that.
So, that said, I immediately (being the task oriented person I am)
conjured up the "perfect date" for the first month!
First, let me share a scripture with you:
"Many plans are in a man's mind,
but it is the Lord's purpose for him that will stand."
I have to laugh looking back, because in typical Maria fashion,
even though he didn't seem all that thrilled with the choice,
I "KNEW" that's what he would really like to do,
because we had spoken of doing it many times!
In just a little while he would certainly realize that!
(Ya'll, we think we are not control freaks,
but I promise you, it hides in us!
It is disguised!)
At first, as the days went by,
and he really sort of dug in his heels over my choice,
in that indirect way, that a good man can.
I was completely stumped, and puzzled...
"Lord? Isn't this what you said do-focus on romance,
take time for each other?
This isn't like him, he always has been interested in this."
And I just felt to wait and be at peace. Here's what happened,
and its really several little things, and I am really SO tickeled,
because I KNOW the Lord is teaching me
about myself, about us, and just life!
These things are going to seem very mundane and simple,
but that's where we are at,
and it really has blessed us so far...
it's a process, a progression, not a destination.
1) First of all, we did not go on my "perfect & simple date"!
2) He did take me out to a simple dinner at Crispers,
(I could have chosen something more extravagent, didn't want to)
just the two of us, twice in the last month.
We talked, flirted, one time we went shopping afterwards,
and one time went for a drive.
3) What God showed me is: Honey, well, he likes to initiate in regards to this!
And in this area, I am very passive,
so this will make the next months interesting,
as we focus on this topic!
4) We have started doing the tread mill almost every day,
first him, then me.
We flirt, giggle, make jokes and generally act like teenagers...
who are dreadfully out of shape! :)
5) I will tell you this little anecdote,
just to show you how simple it can be,
to make them the focus, not Abby or Gabby!
Not the mortage or drum practice, not blogging, but them!
My husband LOVES cauliflower. My youngest thinks it's an alien plague!
Recently, I purchased some cauliflower,
and planned a meal that would have items my husband would expect,
and that would feed my youngest.
And as a surprise made the cauliflower, on the side.
He didn't know until he sat down to dinner.
Our youngest was off, skating with friends.
My Honey was so surprised and appreciatitve,
well, we had to go have a celebration after dinner!
I have made him cauliflower plenty of times, Ya'll!
But this time, there was mystery, surprise, and he was the clear focus.
Now we joke that cauliflower is more of an aphrodisiac than oysters!
Like I have said before, I am not aiming to set the world on fire,
just to keep the homefires burning, Ya'll!
Keep the fun, the mystery, the freshness of
getting to share life together!
And it is my equal hope that it will encourage and inspire you!
I am so hopeful that I will get to learn with you all!
I can't wait for the good things, Ya'll will have to inspire with
& that we can maybe laugh together about!
I mean, cauliflower, Ya'll!! Really?
If you are interested in posting your own journey into The Year of Romance,
feel free to sign Mr Linky, grab the button
(sorry - I don't know how to put text on the button),
and the guidelines are here.